The nurses seemed very excited when I said I wanted to breast feed. I'm not sure how I came to that decision. It just seemed like the thing to do. Kinda like, everyone else does it, so so should I. Of course there is the benefits of all the nutrients in mothers milk, and not paying for formula, but those things really didn't cross my mind.
Abby has cluster feed since Day 1. I remember being so frustrated in the hospital because it seemed like all she wanted to do was eat. And she would always fall asleep eating. The nurses told me that was normal, and just keep feeding her, so I did.
Early on I had concerns that she wasn't getting enough to eat. Given her small size, and her urgency to eat all the time. I visited with the Lactation Consultant and she said she was doing just fine. She was getting all she needed. The pediatrician said the same thing. I still worried. I just seemed like she would eat little bits all day long.
Now that I'm back at work, I have to pump during the day to give her something to eat at daycare. I've been very discouraged with pumping. I tried while I was at home, but it was so stressful. It always seemed that the minute I started she would start screaming, or the minute I finished she would be hungry again.
I'm still stressed. I'm not pumping enough. I usually have the time to pump three times a day. Some days are a little more hectic and I can only squeeze in two. But I'm trying to find a way to get three done. I still haven't found a way to pump in the evenings, after she goes to bed. Its still hit or miss on when she will completely fall asleep. And by that time, I'm beat and on the verge of passing out myself.
The pediatrician okayed that we supplement her bottles. I don't like doing that because I feel like I'm failing her. But it all goes back to my theory that I haven't been making enough from the beginning. That maybe if she was getting more, she wouldn't eat so much.
She does great with the bottles at daycare. She takes 4 ounces every three hours, without problem. She usually eats 2 and half to three hours after we get home. And then its a cluster through the evening until she falls asleep. Which has been early, between 8:30 and 9:00. (Compared to the 10:00 that she was doing a few weeks ago).
So to try and increase what I pump out, I've taking to some herbal remedies. I've also increased my water, but I can only run to the bathroom so many times in a day! I started drinking Mothers Milk tea, a nasty concoction of herbs that smells like licorice. If you can get over the smell, it really doesn't taste that bad. I just chug it and be done with it. I've also started taking fenugreek capsules. Fenugreek is an herb used to make artificially flavored maple products. The main side effects is your sweat smells like maple syrup. Yep, I can confirm that. Valentines day will be oh so romantic with my eau du fenugreek!
Good news is so far I've seen a slight increase in my output. Bad news is, I think its tearing up my stomach. Or I've gotten a stomach bug on top of the head cold I'm battling. I've stepped back the dosage to see if it helps any. I was really excited that I would be making just enough for her now. I really hope its just a bug. I'm finally starting to feel better about making enough milk.
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