My friend the elephant, that is. He's no longer sitting in my lap. He hangs out beside me. I've got Woody on one side and the elephant on the other. I feel like he's just waiting for his turn to come back.
Is it wrong to think like that. I can't help but fee anxious after everything we've been through. I'm in unchartered territory. Why can't I just let it all go and enjoy this time? I am enjoying it, but for all the moments I am happy (or feeling icky), I'm having moments of doubts.
I've talked with others who have been here. Its common. But I just feel so wrong. I want to be naive. I want to walk through the baby section of Target and actually stop and look at things and start to plan. I at least give myself credit for finally walking through the section instead of avoiding it.
I know its early, and I've got a long way to go, so I don't need to do anything major right away. I'm 7 weeks today. We get to see peanut again tomorrow. Maybe that will put my mind at east. Although, I know that might be the last ultrasound for a few weeks.
If I can make it through April, I'll be ok. I've got a lot to keep me busy, so I have plenty to look forward to. Me and my elephant.
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