We have a name!
I've never felt such a burden in all my life. This is the child's identity! What if I choose wrong? I don't really care what others think of it, I just want baby girl to be proud of it. She will live with it forever!
We are going to share it with our parents this weekend and then let the world know. I don't think I can keep it a secret, plus it gives people a chance to call her by her given name. Although we both feel that "Olive" is going to stay around for a while.
We are going to tell JJ and then let him share the news. We want him to be as much a part of this a he can. I think he will like the choice and be glad to share it.
OMG, it feels so real now. I'm having a baby. A real baby!
Wednesday, July 11, 2012
That smell
I associate things with certain smells. Smells bring back memories. Perfumes, deodorants, cleaners.
I'm fortunate enough that I can walk over to my OB's office. Its a floor below the RE's office actually. So, just a short walk through the halls gets me there in under 5 minutes.
There is one point where the hospital changes into the medical office building and at that point the smell changes. Its a smell I will always associate with this journey. It has that medicinal smell, but not overwhelming. Its nothing spectacular, but I have always been able to tell a difference once I get to that hallway.
Lately I have to remind myself that the smell is bringing comforting feelings. The number of times I anxiously walked over there not knowing what I was going to hear. I'm still anxious, but it a totally different way.
After my appointment yesterday I went upstairs to visit the IVF nurse. I didn't want to make a big scene. I know pregnant ladies in the office always felt like a dagger to me. But Megan did so much for me and was so excited, I wanted to show her the newest photos of Olive and share the news. She was happy to see me and see my progress. Its just comforting to know that I received quality care and that I was really felt for.
As I walked back to work, gleaming at the beautiful photos of my daughter I didn't get wrapped up in the smell. I passed through with ease. I guess every time will get a little easier.
I'm fortunate enough that I can walk over to my OB's office. Its a floor below the RE's office actually. So, just a short walk through the halls gets me there in under 5 minutes.
There is one point where the hospital changes into the medical office building and at that point the smell changes. Its a smell I will always associate with this journey. It has that medicinal smell, but not overwhelming. Its nothing spectacular, but I have always been able to tell a difference once I get to that hallway.
Lately I have to remind myself that the smell is bringing comforting feelings. The number of times I anxiously walked over there not knowing what I was going to hear. I'm still anxious, but it a totally different way.
After my appointment yesterday I went upstairs to visit the IVF nurse. I didn't want to make a big scene. I know pregnant ladies in the office always felt like a dagger to me. But Megan did so much for me and was so excited, I wanted to show her the newest photos of Olive and share the news. She was happy to see me and see my progress. Its just comforting to know that I received quality care and that I was really felt for.
As I walked back to work, gleaming at the beautiful photos of my daughter I didn't get wrapped up in the smell. I passed through with ease. I guess every time will get a little easier.
Tuesday, July 10, 2012
A Banana
I found this on another blog I follow and thought it would be fun to do a weekly check up on my progress. I'm starting a little late, but its better late than never. I think this blog has been a great documentary so far of this journey, this just compiles it all into one place for each week.
How far along: twenty one weeks one day
How big is baby: 14 oz
Total weight gain: 10 pounds! I'm up 5 pounds from 16 week appointment. A pound a week I guess!
Maternity clothes: Yes, but not nearly enough. I hate being limited to wearing the same things over and over. I finally just pushed all my old clothes aside in the closet so I can only chose from my tiny selection.
Sleep: Ok. Falling asleep early. Making 2-3 pee breaks a night. Some nights its hard to fall asleep again. I really feel it by Fridays. Friday afternoon I usually take a nap when I get home.
Best moment this week: JJ asking how plump I will get takes it this time!
Gender: Girl!
Craving: Ice cream, fruit, and water.
Movement: She's either a dancer or another soccer star. Usually early mornings and later in the evening she is active. I can start to poke and she will respond. It just takes a little while to get her going.
Labor Signs: I'm not sure I would know, so I'm gonna say none right now.
Belly Button in or out: in, I think it will be in for a while. I've always been fascinated about how far in my belly button is. I can finally see my scar from my Lap last year in there, so I know its thinning, but I don't know if it will totally pop out.
Stretch marks: None yet, knock on wood.
What I miss: sadly, beer. Its summer, can you blame me?
What I am looking forward to: Registering!
Milestones: Just over the hump now. On the downward side. Hoping its all smooth sailing from here!
Monday, July 9, 2012
The F word
I overheard this conversation this weekend:
JJ: How plump will Lisa get?
Gene: giggling... pretty big, just you wait
Gene also continued to laugh at the word "plump". JJ said he didn't know what other word to use. I asked him if he was trying not to use the F word. He said yes. What a sweet boy, trying not to call me FAT! Which Gene thinks is funny to do all the time. (I really know he is joking and I've started to joke along.)
I'm getting bigger and bigger. Or plumper and plumper I guess. I told Gene the other day that I don't feel as cute as I thought I would. He told me I had to work to be cute. Thanks honey, just what I needed to hear. I'm not large by any means. I think for any woman its hard to see you body change like this. I would say there is a little more on my hips than I expected, but I'm not round.
The one thing that has gotten me this entire pregnancy is my lack of energy. I will say it has somewhat improved in the past week or two, but its not totally back. Also, the oppressive heat may have a hindrance on any activity. Its hard to do anything outside because its so damn hot and humid. Not even the lake or pool is comforting. Sure, I could go walk around the mall or something, but that just leads to spending money. I'd rather be plump than broke.
Tomorrow is the big day. The anatomy scan. I'm very eager. I've had some cramping over the weekend. I'm looking forward to talking to a doctor and verifying that all is well with Olive. Cramping always has me concerned, but I know its normal. I've had it off and on the entire time. I should take it as a sign that she's growing big and strong.
JJ: How plump will Lisa get?
Gene: giggling... pretty big, just you wait
Gene also continued to laugh at the word "plump". JJ said he didn't know what other word to use. I asked him if he was trying not to use the F word. He said yes. What a sweet boy, trying not to call me FAT! Which Gene thinks is funny to do all the time. (I really know he is joking and I've started to joke along.)
I'm getting bigger and bigger. Or plumper and plumper I guess. I told Gene the other day that I don't feel as cute as I thought I would. He told me I had to work to be cute. Thanks honey, just what I needed to hear. I'm not large by any means. I think for any woman its hard to see you body change like this. I would say there is a little more on my hips than I expected, but I'm not round.
The one thing that has gotten me this entire pregnancy is my lack of energy. I will say it has somewhat improved in the past week or two, but its not totally back. Also, the oppressive heat may have a hindrance on any activity. Its hard to do anything outside because its so damn hot and humid. Not even the lake or pool is comforting. Sure, I could go walk around the mall or something, but that just leads to spending money. I'd rather be plump than broke.
Tomorrow is the big day. The anatomy scan. I'm very eager. I've had some cramping over the weekend. I'm looking forward to talking to a doctor and verifying that all is well with Olive. Cramping always has me concerned, but I know its normal. I've had it off and on the entire time. I should take it as a sign that she's growing big and strong.
Thursday, July 5, 2012
Confused
With a holiday in the the middle of the week, I'm so confused. Today does not feel like a Thursday. What makes it more challenging, is I use weekends as my marker to when my weeks change and how long I have till the next appointments.
Which makes this week even more confusing because I have an appointment Tuesday. And today feels like Monday, but its Thursday. And I'm still on 20 weeks, not 21.
Its just too much for my hormonal brain to handle.
Which makes this week even more confusing because I have an appointment Tuesday. And today feels like Monday, but its Thursday. And I'm still on 20 weeks, not 21.
Its just too much for my hormonal brain to handle.
Tuesday, July 3, 2012
Luke...
It should be rather, Olive.... I am your father. That's the nightly game Gene plays with Olive. He sticks his face into my belly and talks to Olive. Usually starting off with the classic line, Olive, I am your father. Its pretty cute, and funny.
Then he tickles my tummy with his tongue and I can't help but bust out laughing. Poor Woody always wants to rescue me. The scruffy beard also tickles, but its the raspberry blowing (or zerberts if you're a Cosby kid like me), really get me going.
He listened to my belly for a long time last night. Trying to feel kicks. She's stubborn right now, and won't respond. I hear that's normal. I'm sure they aren't quite aware yet where that poking and jabbing is coming from. I can jiggle my belly and in 10-15 minutes I might feel a kick.
I'm loving this experience. Just one more week till our anatomy scan and we get to see her again. I think we are coming to a consensus on a name. I heard Gene call her my first choice last night. I tried not to act shocked or gloat, but it was good to hear her called something more prominent than Olive. Or Gesa, or Peanut, or Precious Miracle, or Princess.
Then he tickles my tummy with his tongue and I can't help but bust out laughing. Poor Woody always wants to rescue me. The scruffy beard also tickles, but its the raspberry blowing (or zerberts if you're a Cosby kid like me), really get me going.
He listened to my belly for a long time last night. Trying to feel kicks. She's stubborn right now, and won't respond. I hear that's normal. I'm sure they aren't quite aware yet where that poking and jabbing is coming from. I can jiggle my belly and in 10-15 minutes I might feel a kick.
I'm loving this experience. Just one more week till our anatomy scan and we get to see her again. I think we are coming to a consensus on a name. I heard Gene call her my first choice last night. I tried not to act shocked or gloat, but it was good to hear her called something more prominent than Olive. Or Gesa, or Peanut, or Precious Miracle, or Princess.
Monday, July 2, 2012
Half Baked
Today is the half way mark. It seems odd to be half way into it already. I guess the first 5 weeks I didn't really know, so It really hasn't felt like 20 weeks.
I guess now I understand why they say the second trimester is the best. I've had a lot of moments lately were I don't feel pregnant. No pains, no aches, just a big ole gut.
Movements are starting to be more consistant, but they still aren't all the time. The weekends I think are the worst because I have the time to think about it, all the time, so if I haven't felt anything in a while I start to freak out. Just a little kick every now and then is all I need to get me through.
My energy is still a little low, but I think I'm just use to it now. I might not be as exhausted as I was a few weeks ago, but I'm still dragging. I think it has to do with getting up 2-3 times a night to pee. Maybe I should invest in adult diapers. But then again, I wouldn't be able to sleep in the wetness. Ewww...
20 down, 20 more to go.
I guess now I understand why they say the second trimester is the best. I've had a lot of moments lately were I don't feel pregnant. No pains, no aches, just a big ole gut.
Movements are starting to be more consistant, but they still aren't all the time. The weekends I think are the worst because I have the time to think about it, all the time, so if I haven't felt anything in a while I start to freak out. Just a little kick every now and then is all I need to get me through.
My energy is still a little low, but I think I'm just use to it now. I might not be as exhausted as I was a few weeks ago, but I'm still dragging. I think it has to do with getting up 2-3 times a night to pee. Maybe I should invest in adult diapers. But then again, I wouldn't be able to sleep in the wetness. Ewww...
20 down, 20 more to go.
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